I don't think that anyone is particularly good at New Years resolutions, and that includes myself. Last year my resolution was so simple that quite literally a third grader could do it. I bought myself a brand new journal and told myself that I was going to write about my day every single night for a year. (I also made sure to include drawings in the middle of the page that break up the writing like in that journal in Cruel Intentions because, come on. Tell me you didn't watch that movie and think, "Goddamn. Everybody should do that when they keep a journal.") The idea behind the resolution was that this would help my writing by capturing tons of insignificant, otherwise-forgettable moments in my life that I could draw inspiration from later on. This resolution went pretty flawlessly for about four days. Then, from that point on, I fell into a pattern of forgetting to do it for a few days in a row, then remembering one night and having to write three to four full days of journal entries all at the same time. To my credit, while reading it back to myself a year later I can't really tell which ones were done that night and which were done by future Ryan in an attempt to trick myself into thinking that I wasn't royally fucking it up, so go me! But to my anti-credit, it was also pretty hard for me to fuck it up that badly considering I only ended up doing it for sixteen days.
It's pretty easy to look at that situation and say that New Years resolutions aren't for me. A friend once told me that New Years resolutions are actually detrimental to success, since it allows you to push back when you actually start doing something helpful. "Some people might have a really great idea in November, but then they decide they'll make it their New Years resolution and don't end up touching it for two months! And then by the time January rolls around they're not interested in it anymore, so they just say 'fuck it.'" Which definitely makes sense, but as someone who over-prepares and thrives within structure and malleable guidelines, I honestly do believe that New Years resolutions will work for me.
Now, I know what you're saying. "Ryan... You lasted 16 fucking days. AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN DO ALL OF THOSE DAYS ON TIME!" But I don't think that New Years resolutions are a try-it-once-and-see-if-it-works kind of thing. I see them as a very useful tool, and I'm going to continue to practice actually doing my New Years resolutions every single year until I'm a fucking New Years resolution master. Last year I only lasted 16 days? Awesome. This year let's make it 30. And next year let's do 45, and so on and so forth until I'm able to convince myself that committing to something, even over a long span of time, is not as scary as I make it out to be. Sometimes the only way you can do that is through failing a few times over.
Ryan C. Robert is the writer of multiple comedy blogs, most of which are satirical and self-deprecating. He writes about his life in his personal essay series "Before Color," parodies cooking blogs in "Trish's Dishes" and posts writing prompts every single day.